You can Thank me Later!

We often hear the phrase, "Keeping up with the Joneses", but who are they??? Who are these people that make us feel inadequate participants of our own lives?? Who are these people that make us anxious over what we are doing wrong and make us feel we are not up to par?? Who are these people keeping us up late at night thinking about all of the things we are NOT doing that we are SUPPOSED to be doing??


Since no one has stepped up to claim this infamous name, I have decided to officially announce my family's name change...

We are the Joneses !!!

I accept this new role with a smile. AnD because I am willingly, taking one for the team, I am hopeing it will allow everyone to finally sit back and start enjoying their lives. I mean, in all honesty, if you are attempting to "Keep Up" with me, you will never feel inadequate AGAIN! You may actually feel quite successful and maybe even perhaps superior for once! BUT, Before I allow your ego's to get TOO big, I will lay down a few of the things I do/don't expect so you have a bases for your comparisons.....

I do require my family to brush their teeth ONCE a day

I do require fingernail/toe nail clippings, once a WEEK

I do require a please and a thank you in most situations

I (myself) shower, blow dry and make-up EVERYDAY

I do NOT require a coat in cold weather (the kids learn quick! Trust me)

I do laundry almost everyday

Books ARE read every night!

My oldest is 3, she still uses a pacifier and a diaper to Poop

My 2 year old doesn't talk

My 4 month old still eats almost every two hours

Only at Dinner is the food required to stay at the table (notice I didn't say kids)

Hands must be held in ALL parking lots

At least one article of clothing is required to be worn while home

Kids are required to put toys away after use

Jumping on the bed is permitted

Something Green MUST be eaten once daily

Chocolate milk is allowed once a day (unless at Mimi's)

I look at my Blackberry every time it "Alerts" me to

My family has fruit snacks every morning with breakfast

Safety First...But Fun is always encouraged!

I BUY baby food...(non-organic is fine, I don't discriminate)

I buy store brand food

EXCEPT Ketchup and Mac & Cheese MUST be name brand

Hands must be washed after using the bathroom

My kids are vaccinated (I trust my Doctor, just like they trust me as their Realtor)

Kids are allowed to play hand held devices (amount of time is strictly dependant on what I need to get done that day)

We use 1-2-3 Magic for discipline purposes

Dessert is permitted after each meal as long as food was eaten

Going outside is optional during the winter months...its cold out there!



Are you thanking me yet?? Don't worry if you don't send me a Thank you note, I don't require them!


I am hopeing that now you have a face to the "Joneses" you will begin to accept yourselves for who are, instead of what you are not!

AND

You may actually see that you are in fact "Out Doing The Joneses"


Can you feel the relief yet?

P.s. My kids are very happy and Healthy! They even call us the best mommy & daddy ever! and isn't THAT what its all about??