You can Thank me Later!

We often hear the phrase, "Keeping up with the Joneses", but who are they??? Who are these people that make us feel inadequate participants of our own lives?? Who are these people that make us anxious over what we are doing wrong and make us feel we are not up to par?? Who are these people keeping us up late at night thinking about all of the things we are NOT doing that we are SUPPOSED to be doing??


Since no one has stepped up to claim this infamous name, I have decided to officially announce my family's name change...

We are the Joneses !!!

I accept this new role with a smile. AnD because I am willingly, taking one for the team, I am hopeing it will allow everyone to finally sit back and start enjoying their lives. I mean, in all honesty, if you are attempting to "Keep Up" with me, you will never feel inadequate AGAIN! You may actually feel quite successful and maybe even perhaps superior for once! BUT, Before I allow your ego's to get TOO big, I will lay down a few of the things I do/don't expect so you have a bases for your comparisons.....

I do require my family to brush their teeth ONCE a day

I do require fingernail/toe nail clippings, once a WEEK

I do require a please and a thank you in most situations

I (myself) shower, blow dry and make-up EVERYDAY

I do NOT require a coat in cold weather (the kids learn quick! Trust me)

I do laundry almost everyday

Books ARE read every night!

My oldest is 3, she still uses a pacifier and a diaper to Poop

My 2 year old doesn't talk

My 4 month old still eats almost every two hours

Only at Dinner is the food required to stay at the table (notice I didn't say kids)

Hands must be held in ALL parking lots

At least one article of clothing is required to be worn while home

Kids are required to put toys away after use

Jumping on the bed is permitted

Something Green MUST be eaten once daily

Chocolate milk is allowed once a day (unless at Mimi's)

I look at my Blackberry every time it "Alerts" me to

My family has fruit snacks every morning with breakfast

Safety First...But Fun is always encouraged!

I BUY baby food...(non-organic is fine, I don't discriminate)

I buy store brand food

EXCEPT Ketchup and Mac & Cheese MUST be name brand

Hands must be washed after using the bathroom

My kids are vaccinated (I trust my Doctor, just like they trust me as their Realtor)

Kids are allowed to play hand held devices (amount of time is strictly dependant on what I need to get done that day)

We use 1-2-3 Magic for discipline purposes

Dessert is permitted after each meal as long as food was eaten

Going outside is optional during the winter months...its cold out there!



Are you thanking me yet?? Don't worry if you don't send me a Thank you note, I don't require them!


I am hopeing that now you have a face to the "Joneses" you will begin to accept yourselves for who are, instead of what you are not!

AND

You may actually see that you are in fact "Out Doing The Joneses"


Can you feel the relief yet?

P.s. My kids are very happy and Healthy! They even call us the best mommy & daddy ever! and isn't THAT what its all about??

Middle Child

I am too tired tonight to blog.....

But, BEFORE I go...I would like to say,

Happy Birthday Benny Boy!

Life is so much sweeter with you in it!

You are the greatest little boy!

I Love you!

Lunch Time!!

Its 11:50 a.m. are your kids dressed.......

In their Pajamas???





MINE are!

PLEASE forgive me!

I was at IKEA not long ago and I decided to take the elevator up to the showroom. In the elevator with me was a young girl, her grandparents & an IKEA employee. The party of 3 were there for IKEA's fine dining. During our travels, the IKEA employee sparked a conversation with the little girl: (this is the short hand version)

Employee: Hi, How are you?
Girl: Hi, good
Employee: So, you like coming to IKEA?
Girl: Yes, its my favorite place!
Employee: Oh, maybe when you grow up you can work here

Grandma: NO, she is going to college!!!!!

oh SnAP!

This immediately made me think back on when I was in college. My roommate went on a diet. She came back from winter break and was really excited to show me that she was now wearing my same pant size. (oh to be that size now) naturally I congratulated her, right? Oh no, not me, instead, I turned to her and said "See.... I told you I wasn't thin!"
I know! I know! I know!
It still makes me cringe! I didn't mean it the way it came out! and 11 years later, I stiLL remember that awful moment!

I lack the filter, the ability to think before I speak. clearly I am not the MoST intelligent person! you would think I would have learned to take a few extra moments to make sure my words were correct before blurting them out. NOPE. Imagine being in my company after a few too many cocktails. Yikes! And I actually wonder why my only friends are my kids? ? ?

Sooooo.. I would like to take this opportunity to apologize. to anyone and Everyone! if I ever said anything that was insulting. I seriously didn't mean it. Clearly the filter needs some replacing.....and my goal is to accomplish this before I take my grand kids to fill up on Swedish Meatballs!

Round 2!

Well, as I look back on the WHOPPING 3 posts I did a year ago....It is impossible for me to not reflect on the last 12 months. My middle child is turning 2 on Friday.....(oh yeah, Did I mention I got pregnant and birthed a 9 pound 6 ounce baby in the last 12 months....#3 was a HUGE shock! I can promise you though, ALL necessary precautions have been taken to be sure that if this is in fact the only post this year, I will NOT be introducing you to baby #4 in my first 2012 post).

So, my second born will be 2 on friday, my first born will be 16 (you may think this is a typo, but it is NOT, trust me, this 3 year old is pre-menstrual, with a capital P) in March and my third born will for 4 months in about a week. Me, I will be 30 this April and I can't tell you how excited I am for this. I am so done with my 20's and am really looking forward to my 30's. I mean, aren't you finally an adult at 30?? right??.... Bueller? ........ Bueller??

Anyway, this past year has been quite a ride...We are now a family of 5.. my day consists of running the washing machine 3 times, dishwasher once, emptying the garbage, changing 3 poopy diapers, watching "UP" twice, emptying the garbage, hearing the beloved "Mama" chant more times than I want to count, arguing about fruit snacks, giving in to fruit snacks, emptying the garbage, showering, changing the kids out of their pajamas just in time to put on a new pair, cooking (mMmm, maybe warming is a better word here), cleaning, more cleaning, emptying the garbage, working out"ish", coloring, jumping, drinking lots of coffee, emptying the garbage, oh and in the amount of time it takes the kids to eat a Popsicle, I try and sell a house. WAIT, did I mention, emptying the garbage??? I would be lying if I said oooh I love it, but man, I wouldn't change a thing about my life....
EXCEPT maybe the parked car I hit last week...That was Awesome..I could have totally done without that!